25 July 2012

CHANGE YOUR PROCRASTINATION HABITS

Change Your Procrastination Habits

Your procrastination habits may seem to be very deep rooted and, indeed, they probably are. But that doesn’t mean they can’t be changed.

Forget everything you have ever been told about laziness, tardiness, lack of application and short attention span; procrastination is about how we think. More specifically, it is about how we allow certain thoughts to morph into beliefs. If we are serial procrastinators then we will have some underlying beliefs that are getting in the way of action.

RIGHT BELIEF: WRONG PLACE

Here are four common beliefs that lead to procrastination.
They may sound innocuous or even admirable and in some contexts, they may even be useful. But they can just as easily lead to paralysis. A sure-fire way to get more time is to challenge the belief.

1.PERFECTION

It sounds like this:
‘It must be perfect.’
‘I must do it perfectly.’
‘It needs to be right.’
Very little in this world is perfect and in most cases it’s hard to know exactly what ‘doing it properly’ would look like. If we’re confident that we can get it right from the outset then it can’t be very challenging. Anyway, a partial solution may be closer to what’s needed.

2. CERTAINTY
It sounds like this:
‘I must make sure I know all about this before I start.’
‘I want to know what the outcome is going to be before I begin.’
‘I need to know exactly what will be expected of me before I commit.’
Here our intolerance for ambiguity stops us from taking action. We feel as though we will be exposed or that people may discover that we are impostors and we decide that it is safer to do nothing. Sometimes we try to get more information but with this belief, it is unlikely that it will ever be enough.

If everyone thought like this, there’d be no Edisons, Picassos, Gorbachevs or Paul Mertons; and not many books, films or new medicines either. If you need to play it safe, don’t expect a place in the history books.

3. ASSISTANCE

It sounds like this:
‘I need a hand.’
‘Someone should help me out.’
‘I must get some support.’
Do you feel you need to get a second opinion before you start on something? Some of us feel the need to test the water, to collaborate, consult or get advice. Sometimes this may be the smart thing to do, say, when we are doing something that requires specialist expertise.

But, let’s be honest, most tasks don’t. Our advice hunting is a substitute for action. We may even be hoping that the people from whom we seek advice will actually do the work for us. Rather like a child asking for help with his or her homework, we’re looking for someone better equipped than us to take on the task.

4. IMMUNITY FROM FAILURE

It sounds like this:
       ‘I must not fail.’
       ‘I mustn’t mess this up.’
       ‘If this goes wrong, I’m a failure.’

The feeling that because we are likely to fail we should not begin. And so not starting provides us with immunity from failure. Waiving this is a big step but so are the potential rewards.

And if it doesn’t work out this time, the worst scenario, once we’ve wiped the egg off our face is that we’ve learnt a lot. For resilient people, failure is the seed of future success.

(The Coaching Academy - 24/07/2012)

11 July 2012

I WON'T GIVE UP

I was sent this link by a friend...what a lovely way to tell someone you care.....

9 July 2012

YOU MUST NOT QUIT

When things go wrong as they sometimes will
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill
When funds are low and debts are high
And you want to smile but you have to sigh
When care is pressing you down a bit
Rest if you must - but don't quit!
Life is queer with its twists and turns
As everyone of us sometimes learns
And many a failure turns about
When he might have won had he stuck it out
Don't give up though the pace seems slow
You might succeed with another blow
Success is failure turned inside out
The silver tints of the clouds of doubt
And you can never tell how close you are
It may be near when it seems so far
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit
It's when things seem worst that....
YOU MUST NOT QUIT
(Anon)

That which does not kill me makes me stronger!
(Nietzsche)

People are often unreasonable and self-centred - forgive them anyway
If you are kind people may accuse you of ulterior motives - be kind anyway
If you are honest people may cheat you - be honest anyway
If you find happiness people may be jealous - be happy anyway
The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow - do good anyway
Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough - give your best anyway
For you see, in the end, it is between you and God
It was never between you and them anyway....
(Mother Theresa)